I suppose that everyone reaches that time in life where they think, reflect on and/or re-evaluate their life. That is where I am. Where am I in life? Is it where I want to be? (No) How do I change it? What happened along the way? Like many people going through this I have sought the help and advice from my Bible, my friends and self help books. One of those books my friend Kim recommended. It is called The People Code. It basically gives you good feedback into your true personality based on colors: Red, Blue, White and Yellow. There is no “good” color or “bad” color, it just helps you to figure out your true personality from childhood and ways that you can build on your strengths from it, and also improve on your weaknesses. You only have one dominant color, but you typically will be a mixture of at least two colors. Apparently, I am White/Blue. Of course, since nothing else is making sense in life right now, even that is not clear to me yet (I am still going through the book). You see, I may actually be Blue/White. So am I predominately a “Peacekeeper, Sincere, Tolerant” (White) then a “Do-Gooder, Empathetic, Loyal”? Or am I a “Do-Gooder, Empathetic, Loyal” THEN a “Peacekeeper, Sincere, Tolerant”? It actually is a bigger deal than you may think. Because with the good qualities come the bad ones. So am I predominately “Passive, Boring, Lazy” (White) or “Highly Emotional, Self Righteous, Controlling” (Blue). The book is surprisingly, and sometimes uncomfortably, accurate. It is not a “psychic” type book. It does not get into anything mystical or astronomy. It does not read your past or future. It just tells us how we tick. It explains that although we learn different personalities through life lessons, our core personality is the one we had as a young child. (Ex: a shy person may stand up to a bully and learn to be more assertive from that experience but even though he is outspoken as he gets older, his core personality is still that shy child.) It is important to understand this because when you feel lost – as I do now – it helps me to make sense the reasons of why I am the way I am, and how I can improve some of those dark, ugly qualities that I possess from it. It also explains why other people are the way they are. And how I can understand them better. As a single woman, it also helps me to understand what kind of man to look for, and what kind would never work for me. (I could NEVER date a “Red” man and make it work. Funny enough, I swear my ex is a “Red”. That explains a lot!) Not that Reds are bad. They are great leaders and excellent providers. But they will cut you down with words if you make them mad. They are short tempered and judgmental.
So anyways, I know that there is so much more to this mid life crisis than reading a self help book. Added into the mix I have a teenager who is too “high school cool” to hang with mom and the never ending search to find “the job” (noticed that I said THE job, not a job.) I pray that I find that one job that I enjoy, one that will not give me a nervous breakdown from the pressures and stress of it. Oh, and I have hopped onto the photography bandwagon, The scrapbooking bandwagon, the wine bandwagon, the football bandwagon, the pilates bandwagon, the organic food and products bandwagon and the blogging bandwagon. Most of my blogs will aim at being thoughtful, yet humorous. If you can’t laugh through the craziness in life, you’ll never make it. I am becoming more and more convinced of that every day. I am also convinced that good friends are sometimes the best form of therapy in life. One day they should make a movie about my life. It would be an Oscar contender for sure. haha (A mixture of the female version of Dan In Real Life “Put it on my tab”, American Beauty and Girl, Interrupted) I also hope to post some of the photography that I take on here soon – I hope you enjoy it.